The Direction of My Day
Have you ever woken up in the middle of the night with eight million thoughts running through your head? That’s what happened to me two nights ago. I awoke with feelings of guilt, uneasiness, and obviously unrest. Have you asked yourself any of these questions recently?
Have I spent enough time with my family, or am I working too much?
Have I made enough effort towards this person?
Did I say the right thing in that conversation?
Am I standing up enough against racism and sex trafficking?
Am I a good enough friend, daughter, mom?
Am I doing the right thing by sending (or not sending) my kids back to school this year?
I feel like I’m trying my hardest, but am I enough?
If you’ve felt like this, I have some bad news for you. You aren’t enough...but I also have some good news for you, you weren’t expected to be enough... freeing really.
A friend of mine posted something the other day, something I’m sure you’ve heard, “God will not give you more than you can handle.”
Can I handle being enough for everyone around me?
The answer my friend is “no.” You cannot meet all the needs of your husband, family, friends, co-workers, Facebook community. Why? Because you are not God.
Check out 2 Corinthians 1:8-9 which says,
I remember going to my first marriage conference when Travis and I became Christians. The speaker asked us how you would rate your priorities or the people in your life? Who/what comes first?
I’ll have to admit God wasn’t first on my list. My husband was. I mean, I wanted to be a good Christian wife who poured the most into her marriage.
The speaker explained in order to put our husbands first, to put my family first, my friends, and everyone around me, I had to put God first. He is the only one who can truly understand my husband or my children or my friends. The best thing I could do for them is to focus my relationship on Jesus, which in turn would lead me to become a better wife, mother, and friend.
See, the fact that we aren’t enough doesn’t mean we just give up and say, “God will handle it, so why bother even trying?”
No, we allow the Holy Spirit to guide us to show us where our hearts need to change, where God has called us for that day, that moment where he wants us to make an impact through him. To be free to know who God is and who I am not.
What does this look like in the practical everyday world? I pray a lot. I could probably pray more, but I try to talk to God all day. When I am feeling weak or insecure, or when I feel like I’m about to lose my patience, or when I have no idea what to do in a situation, I pray, and then I pray some more. I pray until I can react somewhat sensibly (OK, I fail at this, but this is what I try to do).
I read my Bible every day. I can tend to jump on Instagram first thing in the morning to find happiness, direction, and worth, and although I do love seeing pictures of my friends kids and everyone successes, it can sometimes leave me empty. God’s word, the Bible on the other hand will challenge me, understand me and it always leaves me moving in the right direction.
The last thing I do is ask God to show me what he has for me today. I ask him to change my heart and if there’s anything, any place I need to grow, I invite him to be the direction of my day.
Although we will fail, we will come up short, and we won’t be enough, we can walk in grace. How? In Christ. God sent his Son to be enough to cover it all.